Lisa, that's an excellent topic that doesn't get discussed at all. I guess it's difficult to find young people who would admit to desisting - I remember one being interviewed by Benjamin Boyce, I think, a young man with autism. But that's about it. My own kid seems to be desisting - she reverted back to her birth name everywhere but in s…
Lisa, that's an excellent topic that doesn't get discussed at all. I guess it's difficult to find young people who would admit to desisting - I remember one being interviewed by Benjamin Boyce, I think, a young man with autism. But that's about it. My own kid seems to be desisting - she reverted back to her birth name everywhere but in school, and she's dressing very female-typical nowadays. She wore sparkly heels and makeup to prom... But at school, the only real place she socially transitioned, she still maintains her chosen name and pronouns. I'm thinking it's because it's embarrassing to admit that you were "wrong" about your own identity... Also, all her teachers had to put effort into remembering to use the new name and pronouns. She doesn't want to make them have to do it over again, especially not in her last year of school. But all these thoughts are just my conjectures - I really have no idea because I haven't spoken to her about it. She's still not ready to say much about her current feelings regarding her gender identity, and I know better than to push for answers.
This is exactly why I want to write about it—I think we make it hard for kids to have it be a phase when we solidify it in school forms and make a big announcement to friends etc. you don’t get a celebration when you move on from the identity…
And I should add that we insisted that all school forms, awards, report cards etc. list our child's given name, and the school was happy to do it. It's not at all a school that's captured by gender ideologues. We never made an announcement, never celebrated... Her social transition was as low key and as circumscribed as possible, and yet it is hard to leave. My kid is now applying to jobs and universities and is using her legal name, the same she has on all her school documents. Imagine how difficult it would be for her to step away from this if everything was in her chosen name? If she had to "revert" not only in school but in music class? Church? With extended family?
Lisa, that's an excellent topic that doesn't get discussed at all. I guess it's difficult to find young people who would admit to desisting - I remember one being interviewed by Benjamin Boyce, I think, a young man with autism. But that's about it. My own kid seems to be desisting - she reverted back to her birth name everywhere but in school, and she's dressing very female-typical nowadays. She wore sparkly heels and makeup to prom... But at school, the only real place she socially transitioned, she still maintains her chosen name and pronouns. I'm thinking it's because it's embarrassing to admit that you were "wrong" about your own identity... Also, all her teachers had to put effort into remembering to use the new name and pronouns. She doesn't want to make them have to do it over again, especially not in her last year of school. But all these thoughts are just my conjectures - I really have no idea because I haven't spoken to her about it. She's still not ready to say much about her current feelings regarding her gender identity, and I know better than to push for answers.
This is exactly why I want to write about it—I think we make it hard for kids to have it be a phase when we solidify it in school forms and make a big announcement to friends etc. you don’t get a celebration when you move on from the identity…
And I should add that we insisted that all school forms, awards, report cards etc. list our child's given name, and the school was happy to do it. It's not at all a school that's captured by gender ideologues. We never made an announcement, never celebrated... Her social transition was as low key and as circumscribed as possible, and yet it is hard to leave. My kid is now applying to jobs and universities and is using her legal name, the same she has on all her school documents. Imagine how difficult it would be for her to step away from this if everything was in her chosen name? If she had to "revert" not only in school but in music class? Church? With extended family?